Detours at a Glance
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Never Been Kissed
Song: RIIVERDANCE Artist: Beyonce The previous post got me thinking about the fact that I’ve never been in a real relationship, as an adult. Never courted properly, never been on a date, and never kissed. It’s partially my fault because I grew up in the city and I did a lot of things I had no business doing at an early age. I definitely thought I would be married by 18. But I met someone at 17 and he was 3 years older than me. I never expected that to turn into a mess where this guy who I could go on and on about, but won’t because I’m healed…
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An Open-Letter to a Name that Rhymes with, Bliss Action:
Song: It’s WhateverArtist: Aaliyah Working on self-healing because the past is someone else’s business— not mine. This is an open letter to someone who I have not had the opportunity to speak to and I think it’s time to be free from the things I’ve been holding in, in regard to them. Dear You, For whatever reason, you’ve been on my mind heavily this weekend. And this is not the first time. It’s perplexing how after all these years, you’ve remained on my mind. We didn’t talk much back in high school, but man, the things that were left unsaid. I truly hoped for so long that you’d say to…
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Here’s to Season 3
So so so, many things to be grateful for. I find myself grateful for the chance to see what I’ve done and try to change those things and be better, each day. I’ve had so many realizations recently, such as, learning and being okay with letting people go. The plan is to stay out of the past. When I find myself thinking of the past, I actively stop myself, like, “No way. Stay out of the past!” All of those mishaps from the past literally would not be beneficial to think about in present day but I can take what I’ve learned and move on from that. For this season,…
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Overcoming the Pick Me Saga
Song: Man Artist: JoJo We all know what a pick-me is from social media. The way I interpreted it was a woman who will say or do anything, even if it goes against her own moral compass, in order to be chosen or seen as more desirable, to a man. Now, I would not go that far to get a guy– simply any guy, because I’ve never been the “any” guy type of girl. There was always a specific guy I wanted, for very specific reasons. For me and in my opinion, a lot of the guys who I was into, it was never simply a how they looked, it…
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No Longer an Option
Song: Spotless Mind> Jhené Aiko Line: “Shame on me for changing; shame on you for staying the same.” Y’all know what I think— I think men who have decided to stay stagnant for so long are realizing that they are running out of options. The women they either disregarded or dogged-out are no longer waiting in the wings for them to return. Women’s empowerment has taken form and has been seen right in our faces, thanks to social media. For me, depending on the relationship determines when and if the person should try to come back. I briefly talked to a dude over three years ago— we never met up…
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Oops, I Did It Again
I say oops, but I definitely did it on purpose. I was scrolling through the dating apps, disappointed and disgusted at the options out there—mostly because of the hook-up culture. It’s no judgment from me but if I don’t have anything about looking for a hookup on my page and that’s what you want, clearly we should not spark a conversation. Certain things have been annoying me lately, so I delete them off of my phone. I recently deleted TikTok off of my phone, mostly because it’s annoying— and also because I can’t stand that it has literally turned some influencers “of color” into embellishers for a quick buck. It’s…
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Rebuilding Self-Respect
Are you able to pinpoint when exactly you let someone, specifically a significant someone, try you? I’ve been thinking on how all of my past experiences have caused a ripple effect on my current relationships. Be it in the talking stage, dating, sex, etc. It’s crazy how the disrespect I’ve allowed in my past has literally scared me from doing certain things in future relationships. For example, if someone I once said too much to, then we rekindle years later and then l’m afraid to say too much, so I say too little and do too little because half of me is trying to avoid abandonment. Then, I‘ve come to…
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It’s a Lil’ Update
Hey y’all hey… This is an update because I want you all to know that I am in the ”studio” working on content. After my very cheap and very reliable Acer laptop went out, the Acer that got me through a master’s degree, kindergarten content, writing a book, starting a couple businesses and all of that went out— I tried my best to fix it. I ordered a new battery and all of that but it was done. So, I decided to invest in my businesses and future endeavors by getting what society says is the best laptop, a MacBook. I decided obviously to get the cheapest MacBook, the Air…
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Single Black Female
I’m not sure if this is a trend for attention on social media or if this is genuine but I see a lot of young women online stating that they are looking for other girlies to hang out with. Or they say they see women who they want to be cool with but are scared to approach them. When I see this, I feel a little curious to know if they are looking for genuine friendships or are they looking for someone to compete with. The way women have been trained to compete against each other is scary to see. I also see a lot of posts saying that the…
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I Deleted All of My Dating Profiles
And I did! BLK, Hinge, Tinder, Plenty of Fish,and Woo Plus all have been deleted off of my phone. And I’m pretty sure I deleted the profiles altogether. I was getting so annoyed by these guys and to be honest, I felt that it wasn’t fair to lead anyone on because I was feeling too apprehensive to actually go on a date with anyone. I already told you guys about California and I figure that if he and I are meant to revisit, rekindle, and reinvent what was once a friends with benefits situation, then we will. I’ve mentioned that I really wait on giving my number out and some…